We’re all aware of the power of gratitude ~ whether it’s expressed in a gratitude journal, aloud to a friend, or in our mind.
While we know that practicing gratitude is good for us, sometimes we are just. not. in. the. mood.
This reminds me of a story from Geneen Roth’s book This Messy Magnificent Life: A Field Guide. Several years ago Geneen (who writes about women, food and weight) attended a month-long retreat at Plum Village in France. She packed for a holiday on the French Riviera and got, instead, four very rainy weeks at this rustic Buddhist meditation centre. As you can imagine, being wet and cold and not properly dressed made it challenging to meditate. One soggy morning her teacher, Vietnamese Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh, asked the group how many people did not have a toothache. He said “When we have a toothache, all we can think about is going to the dentist or taking medication to stop the pain but when we don’t have a toothache, we don’t appreciate the many benefits of the non toothache state.”
I love the idea of taking a quick survey of what’s not wrong.
DP and I tried this exercise a few days ago. Here are some of the things we said were not wrong.
Our apartment is not wrong. It’s a second floor space with a vaulted ceiling and windows at the top of the apartment that let in the most exquisite light. It’s already been minus two degrees Celsius in Karuizawa but our apartment is snug and warm. DP bought this beautiful piece of art (pictured above) a couple of months ago and it still takes our breath away.
The students are not wrong. They’re super-smart and courageous and many of them are willing to be vulnerable in order to create a better life. I realize that I’m completely alive when I talk with them about their lives.
The view of the night sky is not wrong. There’s no light pollution where we live and, when we remember to look up at night, the entire multiverse is right there… sparkling. Not for us, specifically, but simply because that’s what it does.
The autumn leaves are not wrong. Reds, oranges, and yellows remind us that even when the seasons change, life continues to push itself forward. Sometimes more slowly.
You are not wrong. The gentle women and men who read and respond to The Sunday Reader with questions and comments, love for their own journey and gorgeous support of me. You are not wrong. Not one bit.
And guess what? We didn’t stop at five. We kept going all day long. With each not-wrong thing we named, we felt more light-hearted.
We became aware of something that felt very much like gratitude.
We experienced a feeling that was a LOT like happiness.
Now you!
Take five minutes to appreciate the state of not-a-toothache.
List five things that are not wrong in your life right now.
Keep going if you’d like.
Possibly all day.
This post was first published as The Sunday Reader. If you’d like to receive these weekly posts directly in your mailbox, subscribe here. I’d love for you to share this post with your tender-hearted, like-minded friends.
